Got a few things to say on this post today. Starting with the most important.

To Cheryl:

I AM SORRY CHERYL!!!
I don't know what is going on with me today. What I want to say or wish to say is that it must be the stress coming onto me, having the End of Year and my piano exam coming up but I know deep down that it is just an excuse. I messed up big time today. Firstly, by ignoring you. I don't know why I did it but it happened. I am very sorry for doing it! Even after the mass I told myelf I must come to you and say Hi! But I just couldn't do it. I really want to say the reason or why I am doing it but it's hard to put into words. (Takes a deep breath) I will try though. It's like I am scared to talk to you. Wondering how you are going to act today or will you come and talk to me or ignore me in total like how you have been doing for the past trillion times. I'm really really sorry!!! Trust me, I will try my best and for a start I aim to say hi to you every morning and have a conversation if I am lucky enough. >.< Sorry for not saying a proper bye to you today! In fact, SORRY ON HOW I HAVE BEEN ACTING RECENTLY!!!






According to a certain someone, my posts are too short so I aim to make this post as long as possible. Onto the
2nd most important thing.

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY TO ALL TEACHERS!!!!!
I screwed up big time today. Came to school late as in like very very late. So I was pissed... VERY pissed at my sis... she forgot where she placed her wallet so she delayed everyone...
(To Ms Seet [if she does see this])
I'm sorry Ms Seet!!!!!! I didn't mean to hand you the wrong present!!!! I am really sorry! It was quite hectic and so I accidentally grabbed the wrong present to give it to you! Sorry!!!!!

Well, today was okay. I guess; oh. Did i mention? I screwed up like a million times. The teachers' day concert was okay. Except for the MCs. Had no idea what they were talking about today; whatever they did had no link to what the performance was. Roshini was going on about how she is going to be the MC for next year's Teachers' Day. Haha. Good luck with that! When I gave Mrs J her present today, I had a shock when she told me she still had the present which I gave her last year!!! I was like O.O Who'd expect her to remember and keep my present?!?

Everything is never what it seems when I fall asleep.

I don't feel like rambling about my life today. I think I ramble too much on it. Time I kept some a secret. :D

I think my mum is right; I am too sensitive. Yesterday, I went for roller blading n the guy was like telling me how I was doing what wrong n he didn't really specify what was the thing I was doing wrongly. So I got so frustrated that I gave up totally... And my emotions became all messed up.

Today was another thing also. Went to Cheryl's house and I thought about how nostalgic it was. Well, I felt damn out of place. I mean I felt damn extra.... Why am I even typing about this either way? It's my own problem.

Tomorrow's teachers' day. Can you believe it? I got presents for all the teachers. Except for pe and ce... Haha.

I can't wait to see my beloved companion n master tomorrow!!! :D
I guess the only happy thing that happened to me today was going shopping for teachers' day present!!!!

(I finished twilight! Going on to the host!!! ^~^)

Today seriously sucked. After recess my luck went downhill. I think today was one of the days where I was suppose to see 3 dead crows at the front of my house or something like that. Funny thing was my eyes didn't even twitch. Usually when that does happen, I would be having the worst day of my life.

mrs Tang so spoilt my day. I got back my physics test today and guess what?!? I failed!!!!! Such JOY TO FAIL EFFING PHYSICS. The thing was it was by one mark. That was still okay. But what bugged me was Daryl. She asked me how much I got at first then I didn't reply. So she started staring at my paper and trying to catch a glimpse of my marks. I'm sorry but I don't flaunt my marks to everyone to show them that I failed. That pissed me off. Can't she understand that sometimes people don't like telling everyone what they got; can't she respect that at least?

Before that, in the morning, Elsa was sitting next to her and I was trying to study Chem at my seat. But Elsa had to start singing. And I'm not saying that it was horrid or anything but people are trying to study so she should know when to keep quiet or if she wants to sing, go sing somewhere else where people are not studying.

After the test results, Mrs Tang was teaching light anD I was GOING to fall asleep. But I DIDN'T. I still tried to concentrate so as a human I did what any human did. YAWN. WHAT WAS HER FREAKING PROBLEM WITH ME YAWNING?!? I DIDN'T KNOW WE WEREN'T ALLOWED TO YAWN IN PHYSICS!!!! I didn't even did it on purpose. Like wth. She had no right to pick on me just cause I was yawning. That was still acceptable. I admit I am at fault for yawning too obviously. But she was indirectly trying to say that I yawned to show that I know everything and that what she says is not important. Like hello?!? If I would do that do you think I would be BLOODY FAILING PHYSICS????? I was trying to keep myself awake to listen to what she was saying. So I had to try to keep myself busy to listen to her. If I knew everything I would be sleeping like long time ago!!!! Stupid. That seriously, pissed the hell out of me.

Chemistry was another thing. We were doing our pract and Fei Fei accidentally broke one test tube and guess what? She didn't say anything about it not until I stepped on a piece of glass did I find out she broke a test tube. Not only did she remain silent, she pushed the pieces of glass under the table. Who the hell you waiting to clean after you???? At least have the decency to tell the teacher!!!

After that, I was washing my own test tube when she pushed yet another one to the ground and this time Mrs Tay saw. Since I was the one looking at it while Fei Fei remained oblivious to what happened, Mrs Tay thought I broke it. So such joy!!! I had to bloody clean for her! Including the first one she broke and she didn't even say a thank you. DO I LOOK LIKE A FREAKING MAID TO YOU??? WELL I EFFING DON'T!!!! I seriously loath her as my chem partner. This kind of irresponsible person.

Chinese, I arrived late. Had to write essay and I didn't complete it so have to bring home to do. Didn't go home with Cheryl she had to wait for Des.... Haven't gone home with her for the whole of this week yet.
Arrived late for piano. Played shitty pieces and scales. Aural had all the questions wrong. Was waiting for the bus and it started raining heavily. That so fits my mood. Reached home at 4:30. Had a whole load of stuff to do. Don't know how to do one of the Physics question. Will find out tmr. Or else I'll get scolded for trying to act smart according to someone.



Today freaking sucked like shit.

Friday... was one of the worst and one of the best day ever.
Worst because on the way home it was raining damn heavily and its those kind of rain that prove the invention of an umbrella useless. My whole pinafore and sleeves of my blouse were soaked right through. Plus I was walking home with soggy shoes and socks. Haha. Not that bad yet. When I reached home, I was taking off my shoe using my foot and hip hip hooray! The whole base of my shoe came off. So now my shoes are broken. How the hell am I going to find time for a new pair???

And I'm wearing everything that got drenched in the rain to the invest. How great is that? Well, I managed to find an extra pair of sch socks and miraculously, my blouse and pinafore dried in time!!! :D

Finally, the rain stopped. You must be wondering what shoes did I wear there? Well, I wore my BRO'S SHOE!!!!!!! Even though they were 2 sizes bigger, I still managed to pull it off. :D Made my way to Toa Payoh HDB hub. Waited for Sheryl. Then this guy came up to me and he was like "Ni jiang hua yu ma?" Then I nodded. He started explaining to me about some children's association thingy and as you know my chinese sucked so the only thing I understood was like "Ke yi xie ni de ming zi?" Then he pointed to some space to write details. And I thought they just wanted your contacts but turned out I had to DONATE!!! The min. they had was like $10. I only had $10 note.... So stupid... In the end I donated $3. Haha. Remaining went to ice cream with Sheryl and to pay her back for paying for my chem book. Haha. I am one poor girl... So sad.

Yeah. Invest was COOL!!!! Saw Clara make her pro speech!!! GOOD SPEECH CLARA!!!!! Sanzen looked so smart and formal!!! Hahaha.:D And then came the reception!!!! <3 THE RECEPTION!!! The food was DAMN YUMMY!!!!!!!! There was like pasta and doughnuts and chicken and brownie and chicken puff and mini churry puffs. OMG just thinking about it makes me hungry!!! I bump
into Clare also. I MISS HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! Sigh... the most awesome partner I ever had. Nvm, I promised her we would catch up during the dec hols. Hahaha. I can't wait!

I was suppose to make my own way home also but Sheryl made me change my mind. She was like

"Stephanie! Now is the 7th month you know. So when you go home must be careful okay? Really careful. Outside seems quite dark also...." And yupp that freaked the hell out of me. Hahaha. She damn bad lah! That thought didn't even cross my mind and she just had to tell me about it. Stupid Master. Hahaha. But it's damn funny talking to her... Haiz... Monday, get to listen to her boasting her Awesome-ness again. Hahaha. xD

Tonight there is FF7!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Okay, got to go for dinner! Will post tomorrow.
Going to be a long day.






Even when you're not with me, just looking at the sky and knowing that you are seeing the same sky, fills the emptiness that I feel when you're gone. :D

Reason to why I haven't post in a long time is that I officially hate typing on blogger. Now there is absolutly no colour on my post page. Sigh. Well today can be summed up in 6 words.
WORST DAY OF MY LIFE EVER!!!!!

1. Physics test; lost 10 marks.
2. A maths freaking a lot of hw.
3. Suffering from a mental breakdown
4. Why does everyone in the freaking class so DAMN smart?!?
5. Cheryl ignored me half the day
6. Nearly fell onto this guy on the way home in the bus while trying to get off.
7. Ice cream spoon fell onto the bus floor and I had no time to pick it up.
8. FREAKING LITTERED IN THE BLOODY BUS!
9. It's five and I haven't done any hw.
10. There is investiture tomorrow.
11. I am angry and jealous for no reason.
12. FREAKING HEADACHE.

Well, my wonderful life as of for today. Not all of today but this much happening is classified under the worse day of my life. Such joy.






*Master(Mr. Muscle according to Shermain :D): Relax. You are not considered on the worst. Hahaha. Somehow I feel
like I'm adding to your ego. Hahaha.

Its freaking SS test tomorrow and out of everything it has to be SBQ...
Have I told you how much I hate SBQ???
LIKE A LOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tomorrow is going to suck like shit.
Before lessons, have to meet with tps. About sailing.
Got to rush to bio lab after that, followed by chem lab then recess.
2 periods in class before the test comes.... ugh.....
Not looking forward to tomorrow....

Oficially 4 more weeks to piano exam. How great is that?

I'm officially at my limit. Emotionally. I wonder how many more times this is going to keep happening to me. If I'm right this should be about the 6th-7th time. I really wonder how I can just keep going and going. This time it was pretty bad and came down quite hard. You want to know what I am wishing right now? I am wishing that I could just close my eyes and let everything fade away. I wouldn't mind if I forgot everything. Maybe it won't hurt so bad.

Seriously, I hate myself for being so emotionally tuned with people. It's like if someone's angry its my fault. If someone is sad its my fault kind of thing. I seriously had no idea what to do today. Every comfort words I could think of resulted in her being angrier. I was so stubborn. I knew what was going to happen. Yet I still tried. Tried to understand a bit, cheer her up a bit. Apparently it came out all wrong. And voila, got the ending I foresaw. Yet. Yet, I still tried my best and I guess that was the last bit I could handle.

I really wonder most of the time what would happen if I went to 3/1 instead? Or 3/5? But all I could think of was my life would be really diff then it is now. I'm seriously at a lost to what to do already.
I think this is the time when I can cry one litre of tears from what I am feeling now...

Happy feelings gone. Turned out that my cam had no batt... How to take nice pictures??? Haiz... Resulted in using the phone instead. Haha.

It was damn fun!!! We went to Mt Faber for lunch first at this cool but freaking expensive place for lunch. It's called "Jewel Box" The scenery was very nice and it was like "wow" kind of feeling. I actually couldn't believe I was in Singapore. I felt like I was in Cameron Islands or something like that. So after ogling how beautiful it was, we finally sat down to order. This guy came to take our order; being me, I evaluate if the person was scary, kind, hot or pretty- yeah you get it. I was thinking he looked like the lead singer from Click Five!!!! I think it's his hairstyle but seriously, he looked damn cool!!! Hahaha.

The lunch was okay- fine dinning... As you guys should know, fine dinning does not serve much and it was damn expensive. For a plate of Hokkien Mee, it costs $16.80.And the total bill of 6 of us eating came to a total of $290++. Advice from me? The money goes to paying for the scenery. So I suggest don't eat there. Haha.

Headed to Sentosa!!!! Went on the cable car!!! SO EXCITING!!! It's like the first time since 8 years. Going down was alright. It was not that hot and the view was A-MAZING!!!! Took pics on my make do cam. Wanted to post them but I don't have my cable with me. Sad...
Saw the bird's eye view of the construction of the IR and Universal Studio. Can't wait to see it up next year!!!

Reached Sentosa, we went to queue for the Luge! It was thrilling on the ride down. I haven't never seen such a funny cart thingy before. Haha. Its quite hard to control now that I think about it. The whole time I was praying I wouldn't hit the wall or roll off the path. Yet there were people zooming past me, skidding through the corners. O.O How they do that?!?

When I reached the bottom, we took the sky ride up! It was cool!!!!! Your feet are like dangling from the chair as it went up, up, up!!! Hahaha. When you get off, you have to get off fast cause the thing doesn't stop. Hahaha. Did I mention, whatever I did, my grandfather did too?? He's incredible... I didn't expect him to go for the luge also. Hahaha. He looked so cute, sitting in the cart and wearing the helmet. Hahaha.

Next, we went on to the 4D movie. It was some pirates thing. You get to sit and feel whatever the show is showing. I was damn scared so I didn't dare to put my feet down on the floor cause I know something was going to happen. I was right! Hahaha. In the show there was like spiders and crabs attacking you so there will be something tickling your feet. Thank God, I trusted my instincts if not I will jump off my seat. Literally.

After that was the extreme Log ride where its a stimulator ride. The queue was long and so was the waiting time. We waited like 40 mins before we finally went in. By the time we finished, I was dead tired. We proceeded back to the cable car station and rode back to Mt Faber! On the way back, we passed by like houses in the middle of forests and my brother made this comment.
"How do people live in that? Everyday sure got friends visiting them; some with 6 legs, 4 legs, no legs!" Hahahaha...
Okay. I think I have typed too much. Haha. Dad needs to use. Tomorrow school starts!
:D

My sister asked me THE question today. I was surprised that she actually dared to ask me that question. Hahaha.
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
I was like huh? And since it was morning I was a bit blur so it took me like 15 secs to get the question into my head. Haha. I was like what do you think? Then my sis said "N-Yeah."
Me:"Who?"
Sis:"Allen Walker."
Haha. That answer was like far from what I thought she would say. Hahaha. Anyway, its a dream come true if I could even touch him... Stupid tv screen. Hahaha.

Wanted to post yesterday, but I reached home at like 11:30 and my eyes were like =.= Seriously. So to make it up, I am posting early in the morning!! Well, kinda early. Its 10:45. Who posts at 10:45? ME. So its early!!!!

Okay, random moment is over. Was doing bio project yesterday. Swee Ying, Desiree and Cheryl came over to my house. :D We were suppose to meet at 1 but I only reached my grandparents' place at like 12:40 and I haven't had lunch so I thought I was screwed but in the end I manage to finish on time. Haha. Couldn't finish my D Gray Man epi though. Swee Ying and Des came together and it kinda felt awkward cause they were very quiet and looked damn tired so in the end we did small talk and watched tv... Discuss a bit here and there. At 1:30, Cheryl came. Omg. She cut her hair which made her look damn cute!!! Seriously. She was damn adorable.... Hahaha.

Started on our project then. We were like thinking about using lego and cardboard so I was running up and down trying to find everything. When I think about it, my storeroom is very messy. I got lucky in finding the cardboard. So the whole big bag of things containing our project is lying next to my chair at my grandparent's place. Haha.

Dang it. Got to go. So sad. I was getting to the exciting part somemore..... Sniff Sniff. Nevermind! I will be back! Hahaha. Going to Sentosa!!!! ^~^ Must bring my camera!!!

Kept my word. :D
Well, the run kinda suck. I was on my third round and was tired so I decided to walk. I have no idea what is wrong with my freaking back. It's like aching damn badly and with the haze I was panting. Hahaha. Shows you how unfit I am. :D

Later, met my mum and she was like "Why aren't you running?" So I explained the whole thing. And being my mum, hooray, so understanding of her to call the "excuse" I had BullShit. You know, if she wasn't my mum I would have told her straight in the face "Wanna know what bullshit is? Your words are effing bullshit". That was what I wish.

Well, you could say that was a blessing in disguise cause after that I got so pissed that I sprinted the whole way to clear my mind. So technically, her words helped me run. But she'll probably nag at me even more... Haiz....

Came back, had dinner at 9:15. I was deprived from communication cause my bro took my hp with him. At least he had the decency not to read my msgs. Haha. Tomorrow is another day; got to do Bio project, meaning I have to leave at 11 tmr to make my way to my grandparents house cause I suck with directions and so they have no idea how to come to my parents house which is isolated from the rest of the world. Haha. Seriously, everyone who comes here for the first time will get lost.... Even cabs with GPS can get lost in my estate. Should call this the Land of the Lost.

The time has finally come.... Today was the day I found out when I was going to die...
I got my piano exam date TODAY!!! aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
I think that day is like going to be damn unlucky. Firstly its Sept 11. As most will know, its the day when the planes crashed. Next, its during the freaking SCHOOL HOLIDAYS!!!! Which part of HO-LI-DAY don't the stupid music ppl understand.... Okay. I'm officially overreacting. When I think about it, i do tend to overeact. Hahaha. Well, its in my blood I guess. The Stephanie Tham blood. Hahaha.

The countdown officially begins. From today, its only another 4 more weeks till my exam. Well, at least its near. Its like at united square. Hahaha.
Funny thing is that I discovered so much about myself this year. I conclude I am an emotional person. Hahaha. Took me long enough...

i seriously slacked at home today, was doing e maths and thinking (only thinking) about doing physics. Hahaha. If mrs tang found out about this, I think she'll be mad. Hahaha.
Stopping here. Gotta run. (Literally) Will post more tonight. ^~^

Don't you hate it when people are like upset and no matter what you do you just can't be doing the right thing? Well, that's what I'm feeling now, feeling damn useless.... I really have no idea what to do in such situations. And she's right. I don't understand. How to comfort someone you don't understand? You know what makes this worse? Sometimes you open up your heart to someone and then when she's pissed your heart gets trampled over. And that hurts like hell. This is why I don't really like getting too close with people. Its like within a snap of a finger, your heart can feel like it has been stabbed a million times. But apparently, I am unable to prevent that from happening and sometimes I really cry from it.

This morning, my parents fought. Its like recently they have been fighting alot. My sister wanted to wear this pair of red pants but it stuck out of her uniform. So my mum and I told her to change her pants but being her, she threw a tantrum and obviously my mum blew. She started shouting at my sister and at that time, my dad was in the bathroom and he heard the argument and so came out to defend my sister. That time, my sis had already started crying so my dad stomped off the room, half comforting my sister, half throwing off his own temper. On the way, he slammed the door and threw all the spare bed parts onto the floor. If that had happened to you, how would you feel?

When I reached sch I thought I could at least tell Cheryl about it cause I usually tell her about this kind of stuff and somehow she manages to find the right words to say to me but today just wasn't it I guess. She was busy talking to Swee Ying so I didn't have the chance to talk to her about it...

Today, had a mini outing. Haha. For once I actually went shopping with friends. Hahaha. We went to Bugis Junction right after school and it was damn funny. When we reached there, we entered a lift. The lift stopped at the 2nd floor but Amanda suddenly changed her mmind and said Seoul Garden was on the 3rd floor. So we were like okay. But apparently Nat Tong didn't hear and so when the doors opened, she happily walker out and all of us were like "Bye Natalie!!!" Hahaha. She was like "eh?!?" Then she came running back into the lift. Hahaha. Damn hilarious. Well, when we got off, turned out that Seoul Garden was full so I gave the guy my number and then we went to shop. Haha. The table wasn't free till 2pm. According to the guy. So we had like 3-4 hours to waste. We dropped by a few shops to see some clothes and we ended up trying some clothes. Hahaha. Sheryl looks damn pretty in a dress sia. Haha, dunno why she didn't believe us. Hahaha. We then hung out at some dougnut place where the yoghurt was damn nice and so was the iced chocolate!!! We were eating and talking about tangerines when suddenly Nat was like OMG! Then all of uss turned. Guess what we saw?!? This woman sitting in the table next to us with her back facing us. She looked just like Mrs Tang!!!! We were like OMG! Then Sheryl was like "Mrs Tang?" Then the woman didn't turn around so we concluded that she wasn't her. Hahaha. Should have seen Nat's face. It was hilarious.

After that, went for more window shopping at clothes and like at 1 we went to kinokuniya. Haha. BOOKS!!!! I finally saw Absolute Boyfriend manga!!!!! But they increased the price. So I didn't buy it... Instead I bought the Night World book 3!!!!

After that we headed to Seoul Garden. It was damn funny. Cause there was this long queue and I was wondering why the guy haven't called yet. Then speak of the devil, my phone rang but it turned out to be a msg from FarEast mall?!? Haha. Then I saw the guy pick up the phone and calling. I made this comment then, maybe he's callling us? Hahaha. What were the odds? And my phone REALLY DID RING!!! AND IT WAS HIM!!!! HAHAHAHA. The guy was like mumbling so half the time I had no idea what he was saying. So I just said yeah yeah to every question. Until I gave up and we went in to tell the uy personally. I was like "Excuse me? Excuse me. EXCUSE ME!!!!" and he still couldn't hear me. We only got his attention when a guy tapped him for us.

Lunch there was damn funny and I wouldn't mind going back there again. Hahaha. Will continue tmr or Sunday. Today had so many things happening.
I'm so tired and I sprained my back. Luckily, there is no roller blading lessons tomorrow. With my back like that, I have no idea how I'm going to roller blade.

Studying for geog is damn stressful!!!!
ARGH ALL THE DUMB FORESTS!

So many surpirising things happened today. Where to start?
Well, firstly, one I reached school, I bumped into Sheryl and we were talking on our way up to class when Cheryl came up from behind and scared the hell out of me when she grabbed my bag. Hahaha. Interesting start to the day. :D After that, I took out my journal and started flipping through to find this week and guess what? I saw written on monday, Chinese in pencil. At first I was like chinese??? Omg... Chinese CA!!! A nd I forgot all about it so I didn't revise nor did I practice. But then again, you can't study chinese now since they took away the zao ju and wan cheng ju zi.
Then there was CE, I forgot we were writting an assignment so again, I didn't think on what to write but it went fine afterall. Hahaha. And next thing was Amanda and Sheryl started planning a shopping spree on friday after school. Haha. Bugis... Never been there.. Going to get interesting. Hahaha. A maths was.... I've been rendered speechless. Didn't understand at first when she showed us how to sketch the graph. I was freaking slow, had to ask her to come explain to me. Haha. English was okay, thank God I didn't fall asleep..Next came physics. Said bye to my consciousness. She had me lost today. Going throught the latent heat formula and the different ways that she could twist the question. I suffered from a major headache after that. What was worse was that it was Chinese CA immediately after that. So after Chinese I was literally brain FRIED. The next news came during Chinese. I am officially the Physical Trainer for my CCA... And I thought Joan would get it... Hahaha. She became the vice cap. I salute her. Haha. Seriously, I think I'll hold the slackiest PT ever. Joan was like "As your vice cap, you are to make PT the slackiest." Hahaha... With clare around, I don't think so.... Ever since that boat ride, I officially have a phobia of her.
Well, I hope I do get CCA points.
Just now, I was thinking of cutting my hair. Haha. It's seriously long.... Didn't expect it to grow so fast. Last time I cut it was like oct 08' And that was till shoulder length, Haha. And it grew like 5 inches then. No hw today which is good. Managed to finish geog notes... Left my ss tb at home... Well, will try to do physics tomorrow.
I pray tomorrow will be an even better day! (It's early day. What could go wrong?)
Tsk. Shouldn't say too soon... Hahaha
^~^ I MISS SEEING COLOURS ON MY BLOG. *SNIFF *

Who gave you the right to shout at people who are telling you about your mistakes? Seriously, I don't understand my mum. Dad was just reminding you to open the windows and doors, you had no bloody right to shout at him "I FORGOT LAH!" He was kind enough to remind you, why did you have to shout?!? You remind people you don't see them shouting back at your right?!? So who gave you the bloody right to shout?!? Now you're shouting again... everything is solely around you ain't it? Calling us spoilt? Looks who's talking. Think you're tired and need to rest, we need to rest too, you aren't the only one.

Spent most of the time studying today. Almost completed with my geog notes left with monsoon...
Freaking tired and sian. No mood to type anymore.