Truth

I redid my blogskin again. It's definately better than my previous one! :D

Was reading a few stuff just now and I thought about some things. People who are popular seem to follow other people's personality the way they speak and all just to be popular. Is it really worth it? People change. This way is it for the better or the worse?

It seems to me that popular people are never who they really are. They follow until they don't really know who they are of what their true self is. That's how i feel towards my brother. He's changed lately. I just can't figure it out.

He's kind and all but popularity changed him. I really wonder is Secondary life like this? I'm confused with my feelings. I don't know who is the real me right now. I act the way I please but sometimes I get carried away and be irritating towards people. Almost once the words come out, I feel regret. But I can't call my words back. I try to change, be more careful of what I say.

Everyday before school I worry, will they talk to me? Or will they be like last year and ignore me? I try my best but I can't help feeling sort of lonely. That's when I start asking myself, is it me? What did I do wrong? Am I pissing them off with my over-reaction to things? I really don't know. Last week things were okay but I gave in too much of myself now they are ignoring me again. It's now back to a one word reply. Are things suppose to turn out like this? I don't know anymore.

Some times things changes, but will this ever change? I hate myself for being this pathetic me...